Becca: 0:13

Hey y'all, I'm Becca. Welcome to the Flatbill Pastor podcast. This is episode 13. Hey, I know.

Clint: 0:23

Lucky 13. I'm excited.

Becca: 0:25

Yeah, exactly Lucky 13. Hey, lucky 13. I'm excited. Yeah, exactly Lucky 13. Let's just get this, the introduction, started. This is my co-host.

Brooke: 0:34

Yeah, I'm Brooke, and super pumped to be here, especially today. We're tackling an always exciting content, which is back to school. Yes, so we have a few people with us. Ashley, if you don't mind sharing just a little bit about who you are and why you looked forward to back to school, Not at all.

Ashley: 0:53

Thank you, brooke. I'm Ashley Castles. I am a fifth grade teacher at Ruth Hill Elementary and I get really excited about back to school because I appreciate being back with my students and having the purpose and structure back in my life after a long. This summer felt short, but usually a very long summer.

Clint: 1:12

What are summers as a teacher? For those who are like teachers only teach and that's all they do Like. What did you do this summer?

Ashley: 1:19

I was a student this summer. I was attending doctoral classes at University of West Virginia Shut your mouth, let's go so.

Brooke: 1:29

All right, I was a student and teacher.

Clint: 1:31

Yes, how much longer do you have now?

Ashley: 1:34

I think a year and a half. A year and a half, okay, yes.

Clint: 1:37

Let's go. How about that?

Ashley: 1:38

It's my second semester this summer, yeah.

Clint: 1:40

Yeah, that is exciting. Wow, A whole semester and just cram it in.

Ashley: 1:44

Yeah, go Fast.

Clint: 1:45

That's right. That's right. No Lake Life for you.

Ashley: 1:47

I start next week.

Clint: 1:48

Okay, oh gosh, Okay so you're full-time teaching and doing doctrinal program.

Becca: 1:53

Yes, sir.

Brooke: 1:53

Yeah.

Clint: 1:53

That's cool.

Brooke: 1:54

Wow.

Clint: 1:55

That's exciting.

Brooke: 1:56

Yeah, that's cool yeah.

Clint: 2:00

Oh me, my name's Clint. My name's Clint and I am a pastor at Foundation in downtown Noonan.

Brooke: 2:08

Nice, yeah, nice, ta-da. And then, last but certainly not least, we have I'm Malinda, Malinda Moore.

Malinda: 2:16

I'm a mom of four kids. Four different schools college, high school, middle school and elementary.

Clint: 2:22

Let's go oh that's nice.

Brooke: 2:23

Yeah, that's good. Whatever they could be going through, we're doing it all at the same time. Yes.

Clint: 2:29

So the ages walk us through that.

Malinda: 2:32

My oldest is almost 19, and then I have a 16-year-old, 12, and 9.

Clint: 2:37

Gotcha.

Malinda: 2:37

Wow, I have to think about it. That's a spread For sure so.

Becca: 2:40

So your mornings are a little hectic. Yes, All over the place. Drop off.

Brooke: 2:45

Yes, yeah, so I imagine that is probably getting in the groove of back to school. Obviously, your older kids can probably help a wee bit with the younger ones if they feel so inclined, but I can imagine walking through back to school, especially with the different age groups. There's all kinds of different things rambling through your head at the same time. Yes, now do you just wake up on like July 31st and you're like you know what Tomorrow's back to school. I'll start worrying today. No, not at all, probably. So I mean when, like, as you're gearing up, I know for us it's like okay, the two weeks before is when you start. Oh, we got to get ourselves together.

Brooke: 3:25

We got to get it back in gear, so what?

Malinda: 3:29

does that look like for you typically? Well, it's been. I guess this summer has felt really fast to me. It was, it felt really fast yeah.

Becca: 3:36

Agreed, we blinked.

Malinda: 3:38

Yes, but the last couple of weeks I've just been trying to plan, make sure my oldest has all of her college stuff. She's gotten most of that stuff together, but when I took her today actually to get her all moved in, we had to go buy a couple stores and she still might need some more things.

Brooke: 3:56

Last night on Target right.

Becca: 3:58

Yes, we went to Target.

Malinda: 4:01

But I try to make sure we have all the things that we need and just be prepared. Prepared because I want them to—I prayed a lot because I want them to enjoy it, but I want them to stay with their faith and stay focused and be learning and I want it to be a good year, so I'm hoping for that, Of course.

Brooke: 4:20

For sure Are there some worries and concerns that are mixed into that of just hey, we're moving into new school year and just some fears that you have as a mom. Like I said, you have kids on the map with all the things. So I'm sure they range, but there's some that are probably consistent for all.

Malinda: 4:34

Yes, Probably for me. Well, speaking of my younger children especially, just like wanting them to be able to learn and like and not be. You know, I think about all the stuff that they're exposed to, different kinds of things, and actually I I grew up, I was homeschooled, so for me, public school still is like my kids have been in for a few years, but just all the different things that they're going to, you know, have to deal with and I want them to. You know, I want it to be successful and I want them to grow and I don't want, you know, I want to deal with and I want them to. You know, I want it to be successful and I want them to grow and I don't want, you know, I want them to go forward.

Brooke: 5:09

Yeah, yeah, definitely having two sides of the coin, of that of you having the homeschool experience for yourself. So did you homeschool them as well at some point?

Malinda: 5:17

My first two, yes, and my third one for just like a year. So, and the youngest one still wishes he was homeschooled.

Clint: 5:27

The other three are they don't want to be homeschooled what made you decide to go from homeschooling and and go into the public school system? Well, when I started working full-time, okay, so yes, yeah, yeah, that's hard to work full-time and full-time teach your kids. Yes, yeah, and so would you say that your experience so far has been one of. This is a great decision, or are there times when you're like, oh, I don't know if this is a great decision. Where are you at? How many years are you into this?

Malinda: 5:58

I think I'm about five years in. Yeah, I have mixed feelings about it.

Clint: 6:04

Yeah.

Malinda: 6:05

I appreciate you know you talking about stuff, because these things are always on my mind. This is grow with my family growing up, um, going public school was always just, you know they, they didn't believe in it, so it kind of makes me nervous, but there's been some good things. I would definitely say definitely. I think some of the opportunities for different things that they're doing like you know, they get to hear, learn from different teachers, different kids, different activities there's definitely positive things, but there's some things that do make me nervous too.

Clint: 6:35

So, yeah, what are those things that make you nervous?

Malinda: 6:41

I think, just like them being exposed to a lot of different types of people and different, you know, different values that people have. And also, you know, I would like to know more of like what is being taught. Like you know, I mean, I actually as a hairstylist, I do a lot of teachers hair and I love a lot of the teachers, which makes me that, makes me feel good that there's good people in the schools teaching them. But I get nervous about you know things they may be exposed to. Like you know, now that my middle schooler I worry about, like you know vapes and like you know drugs possibly, and stuff like that.

Malinda: 7:20

Those things make me nervous.

Clint: 7:22

When you think through that, how are you having or how are you handling that with, especially the kids that are obviously your college student has probably already had to wrestle with hey, is this going to be for me or not? For me Probably has a lot of life experience, just because of you know, because of age. But then the boys that are younger, in elementary, middle school Are you having conversations with them about it? How are they responding to it? Do their responses make you feel better or worse about you? Know the potential for their exposure and the decisions they'll have to make when you're not there.

Malinda: 7:58

I would say a little of both. We do talk about it a lot. One thing that you told me, that really you know keeping the conversation open. I feel that's one thing that is going better with my boys, with my girls. I don't feel like we talked about enough stuff and they were homeschooled when they were younger. But I also have to remember when I was, I was homeschooled and when I was probably around 18, I did get into a lot of trouble and stuff and I was homeschooled. So it's not a guarantee that they wouldn't get in trouble, but I have been trying to talk to them about a lot of stuff and the fact that they are talking to me does give me hope that we're talking about the things.

Clint: 8:39

Yeah, for a lot of moms that maybe are worried that they're especially when we're talking about moms to boys it's like, okay, well, I don't. I don't know if my boy will share with me some of these things, because maybe he would want to share it with his dad or fill in the blank, whatever. How have you found or what, what strategy or technique or have you gotten to get them to have conversations and to open up about some of those bigger things?

Malinda: 9:05

Well, I think some of it may be the personalities of my boys.

Becca: 9:12

I also do tell them. Sometimes you could talk to your dad about that.

Malinda: 9:17

There's some things I'm like, yeah, he probably knows a little more about. I'm just kidding. You might not want that, but I feel like at this point I do feel like my boys talk to me a lot. I do know that my older son I feel like he keeps a little bit more things that he probably doesn't. He's very curious about things and that's something that makes me a little nervous, but I do feel like they're pretty open and I'm grateful for that.

Clint: 9:45

Yeah, yeah, when you think through the role of faith, and I mean, obviously you know you've put yourself in a position to say, I want to align my life with Jesus. It's your hope that your kids would align themselves with Jesus, but obviously that's their choice. You know, certainly you have an enormous amount of influence as a parent, but we all know that when our kids leave our sight, that they're going to choose what they choose moment to moment, you know how has faith played a role in both shaping or influencing, but also kind of releasing a little bit them into. I don't want to say the public school system is the wild.

Brooke: 10:33

I mean my teacher.

Clint: 10:34

You know what I'm saying For sure, but you know how has faith played a role in that for you?

Malinda: 10:39

Well, you know, as I got out of the car today, actually I was thinking about just the fact that we have to trust God, and that's what I'm trying to do, truly, like believing that my children are not my children, that they're God's children, Like that's what I try to remember. And you know, when you asked me to do this, it's crazy because at this point in my life, this is like the perfect time, because there's all those thoughts and I do worry about it, like it's the thing that I worry about with my children. But I do think continuing to bring that back to this is not all in my control. Really, these are God's children. They're not, you know so yeah, I think.

Clint: 11:17

I think your answer is the best answer anyone can give.

Clint: 11:22

Pulling that off is a whole nother level, though, right Like waking up every day in the midst of the reality that it's not just conceptual, that they're going to be exposed to some things that we know are unhealthy for them, or maybe not even just unhealthy but enormously detrimental to their development and maybe even to their legal career, or, hopefully, lack of legal career.

Clint: 11:48

There's a lot of things that can happen, especially in a middle school or a high school, that can just go sideways and still saying, yeah God, they're your kids even more than my kids. That's extremely difficult, but I think you're on the money. I don't know that you can have a better approach than that. You know, I think we can get in this conversation of is homeschooling better than public schooling or vice versa, and you know it's certainly I. My wife, is a public school teacher, and so I get to experience the magic she creates for students, and I see the overflow of that when we're out in public and the joy that kids have when they see her, and sometimes the dread she has when she sees that they're going to see her.

Clint: 12:41

But just this I love to put her on the spot and she knows it's coming, because every student that comes up to her, I wait for them to do their whole thing, and so it's obvious that she's taught them. And so I'll say, hey, when did she teach you? And they'll say, oh, five years ago, six years ago, last year. She's my teacher now and I always ask be honest with me, is she any good as a teacher? And the reviews are just like through the roof, which I'm not. I mean, she's obviously standing there right, so it's kind of a you know, but it's just. There's never a hesitation, it's always no.

Clint: 13:14

I mean, she's one of my favorite teachers and when I think about and I know not all teachers, just like any profession, wake up every morning thinking this is the reason God put me on the planet. For some people it's turned into this is how I get by and this is how I'm going to make a living. And that's a tough place to be when you do anything, much less when you're going to teach someone else's kids. But, that being said, I look at people like my wife and other teachers that I know I think Ashley falls in this category and just think man God has used them to bring so much more value to their life than they would have ever had the opportunity, because the public school system is such an incredible tool, and we've got a ton of homeschool families in our church and the cohorts that they're a part of. I think they do an incredible job, and obviously there's a lot of kids that have now grown into high school students that are volunteering and are a huge part of our church.

Clint: 14:13

So, 100%, I think homeschooling has an enormous amount of benefits, but I love the public school system, and with that, though, you've got to love the public school system and know that the public school system isn't the church and that it isn't actually supposed to be, that the church, the church itself, are the people that are connected to Jesus, and we carry that wherever we go, and so our expectations can't even be that the public school system would meet our standards of the church or meet the expectations we would have of the church.

Clint: 14:50

People say, well, it's a separation of church and state. All good Jesus followers know that there's nothing that can separate us from the good work God has called us to do, whether it's in the government or in the school system or wherever. Wherever we go, we carry the values and the heart of Jesus with us and we can't put that down Now. It might influence how teachers will respond or react or the words that they use, but the same way, just because it's not as overt, the heart of Jesus is in the hands of teachers and in the words of teachers as they speak life into kids and I think it's great and incredible when our kids are fortunate enough to have a Jesus follower teach them algebra or teach them how to subtract or how to write in cursive, which I don't know if they actually do that anymore.

Becca: 15:41

I don't think so.

Clint: 15:42

My kids for sure can't write in cursive and they make good grades.

Brooke: 15:45

I don't think so. My kids for sure can't write in cursive and they make good grades. I don't think that's a thing. Is writing even a thing that they work on now, past kindergarten or first grade?

Becca: 15:51

They're like Chromebooks. It's fine, that's right.

Clint: 15:56

So the other day Hadley, my daughter, she was actually she's a little impatient. Her complaint for the day was that people were not taking notes fast enough. She was like you know, she's on this little computer and I'm assuming it was the computer. I mean, I've never seen handwritten notes. I mean, yeah, I'm assuming it's the computer, and she was upset that there was a long pause from the time they put the stuff up. Here's the notes and she's looking around. She's like they were on like the second word. You know what I'm saying. She's like I was already done with the whole sentence. Why does it take so long? I was like, whoa girl, slow down. You got a whole 180 days, 178 days now to go. They'll be okay. Anyway, I don't know where I was going with that, but nevertheless, that's your concern is that she won't slow down.

Ashley: 16:42

Yeah, that is my concern, that's also a beautiful thing about public schools. I was raised in public school and I choose to be a public school teacher and I wouldn't want to be outside the public school system. But that and I have a daughter in fifth grade. But they're exposed to things that do try their character.

Ashley: 17:01

You know, you do have to slow down for the other kids around you who are not like you, you do have to be patient. Brianna's very similar to Hadley. She's a high achiever and she wants to be done and be done quickly and things come easily. But learning the patience, learning to take your turn, learning it's not all about you. You know that we are one piece of a puzzle and you don't just get that immediate attention and you can't lead everything every time. You know it humbles them to be in a classroom where they're one of several instead of this whole environment operates around you. So I do love that part of public education a lot.

Clint: 17:38

Yeah, I think, yeah, I think it's a nail on the head.

Brooke: 17:40

Well, and I think too, like the difference in exposure from like a you hate to talk, a moral standpoint, but like that you have. Hey, these are the rules within my household that we want to make sure we uphold. And then, if there's kids that maybe I mean, I was for sure a kid that had very few roles and thankfully I wasn't a wild and crazy child, but you know, I didn't have a ton of rules growing up, and so I would have been the morally corrupt kid that everyone was like we're not letting our kid go to that kid's house.

Brooke: 18:12

That would have been me. But knowing that that it is that catch, 22 of you want them. I mean, my kids go to public school as well. So, like you, want them to have that exposure because it creates character and life and just how to deal with things. And again, not to say, okay, homeschool kids don't have that at all, because I think you can create that exposure. But it's such a catch of it that, yes, you want your kids to have this exposure while at the same time you also want to keep safe the morals and the values and the things that are so important to your faith or your home, just in general. Those are so important and it is. It's a hard thing, but I think the both of you hit the nail on it with saying it's a concern for you as a parent, it's a concern for you as a teacher of just hey, I want to make sure they're exposed, but they're exposed healthily and it's the right way. And again, it's the exact same thing for you and those fears and concerns.

Clint: 19:13

Yeah, I think you know you mentioned homeschool can create it. It requires a lot of intentional effort and all of my friends that were homeschooled growing up they'll I mean they'll tell me homeschooling now is very different than when they were homeschooled growing up, that there's so many more opportunities athletics and opportunities to get in which. I mean I don't actually have a lot of interaction on a regular basis with the homeschool community other than from a church standpoint, and we have a lot of friends but I don't watch and see what those things are happening. But I do know that my homeschool friends are some of the busiest nonstop always on the move, people with lots of other kids and it seems like all my homeschool friends also really love the woods and they are constantly at a Creek or something like that Nature is educating you know, so I think I think that's.

Clint: 19:59

I think it's good too. I I think you know public school has got such a negative rap with it, oftentimes because of the things you're concerned about and I know from a pastor's perspective it's what I'm supposed to say because just the stereotypical thing that comes with it. It's my hope and my dream, my prayer, that my kids would be influential enough to change culture, even if the culture is absolutely rotten. That's my hope for my kids. Now, I don't know if my kids have that ability. I don't know if they have that skill set in them. They're still developing those things. But that's my hope.

Clint: 20:44

My hope is that when he walks in a classroom, that he sees the marginalized or the forgotten about and he befriends them. My hope is that when he sees someone being bullied, that he's not the cause of it but he's a catalyst for putting a stop to it. My hope is in my daughter. I think she's gorgeous. We have lots of mean girl conversations with her about. These are life that are leading in a way that's so contrary to what I think is easy for some girls to fall into in the mean girl world, and that she becomes someone that, even though she is crazy, feisty, very spicy little girl that she becomes someone that leads with compassion. And I know that I don't have that expectation, that they're flawless at that, but I do have the expectation that they understand that that is an expectation Jesus has of them and that they ought to be working towards it. And, at the end of the day, our mission whether we're going to do it through homeschooling or through the public school system is, whatever venue we're going to subject ourselves to, we have to know it should not be solely Christians. We should not insulate ourselves. Having a group of only people who think just like I do believe the exact same things I do are anti, the same things that I'm anti. If we insulate ourselves with only that crew, then we have fallen short of the mandate that Jesus gives us to go into a world that doesn't know him and introduce them to him, and I think that takes time and a process.

Clint: 22:45

But it also requires a risk for parents like you, and that's a scary thing to think. I'm teaching my kids to be at times in a place where I probably could protect them a little bit better if I micromanaged everything. But I'm going to have faith that I've done my part as a parent as best I can, and that these kids are God's kids. You put it perfectly From a teacher's standpoint.

Clint: 23:19

When you hear a parent which I'm sure you talk to parents often but when you hear a parent, that's apprehensive sure you talk to parents often, but when you hear a parent that's apprehensive or just maybe not apprehensive but like nervous about the school you're getting started and just some of the things that her boys might come in contact with, how does it make you feel as someone that ultimately, it's not you you don't teach her boys, but someone like you she's trusting, is going to act on her behalf in terms of their safety and their well-being, which could be very similar to safety, but mental well-being, mental health, all those things she's like. You know what? I think these teachers are going to treat my kids in a way that they would want their kids to be treated. How does that sit with you? Does it bring extra pressure or it's like? No, I don't even think about that. I'm just trying to make sure my scores get good Diagnostic test.

Brooke: 24:15

That's right Today.

Clint: 24:16

Yeah.

Malinda: 24:16

So, walk us through that.

Clint: 24:22

How does it feel? Just pretend you're not a parent, but yeah.

Ashley: 24:26

I love that part of of the career that I get to be a part of, like that hypes me up. Um, and I think that's you what you. You are correct that there are some educators that have either lost their passion or they kind of fell into, they got a degree in something and then this kind of was the career that was open and they had to work. But I will say that a majority, a vast majority of the educators that I'm connected to are very passionate, purposeful teachers, both male and female, in the public school system. And there is a drive when you realize, when you drop your kids off at school or when they get off the school bus, that you are trusting me to be the pseudo parent, the pseudo authority, the caregiver, the protector, and I take it very seriously. I love it and I do think a lot of that comes from the number one job being safety, because the standards are going to change, the tests change often, the curriculum changes often and I joke that you know I'm decent at my job, but it's not. I'm kind of a jack of all trades when it comes to curriculum. I've done across the board, but it's the relationships and the concern for safety and realizing the value of that role in our job. So for me personally, professionally, I get very excited to know that I can bring you that comfort and that I can connect with families that way as a teacher. My advice to parents who would have that concern would be to go ahead and make that you're not bothering us. Make that connection specifically with the teacher and share your story with them and say you know, this is the past that I came from, and here's my hesitancies and here's my hope. Because when you have a relationship with a teacher, it's just different. And I teach in a school where there's not necessarily a lot of parent involvement and I'm very connected to all of my students, or try to be. I try my best to be very connected, even if I wanted to be completely unbiased in all ways. When a parent extends the time and effort to tell me, this is my insecurity, this is where I struggle and I'm looking for you to give me reassurance. It just makes it different. So I appreciate the trust and value.

Ashley: 26:44

I think that's one thing for for teachers to understand that parents are handing over their kid and you're putting this trust in us all day and with society. Now, when you talk about safety. It's not just the mental, emotional bullying. We have the physical safety concerns. You know doing code red drills with other people's kids Every single time. We do that throughout the year. It makes my heart stop a little bit. To know one what it would be like for me to be with these children who are fearful, but what it would be like for the parents. And how do I do I have the trust that they would know I would be doing everything I could to nurture and take care of their kids. But I get a thrill from it. I love it.

Ashley: 27:21

I love that value of that role, but I think the relationship is so important. So, yeah, connect, connect with the teacher.

Becca: 27:28

That's so refreshing to hear because even as a parent, you know it's a vulnerability in a lot of ways to be like, hey, this is what our weakness is. I'm showing up the first day of school and I'm trying to, you know, not unload on this new teacher that I don't know. She doesn't know my children, and it's difficult because I don't want to be judged in a way, or this is my past or I got to play it cool for this new teacher. She doesn't know us. So to know that you're already looking for that reassurance that does everything for me as a parent too.

Brooke: 28:06

Yeah, even the vulnerability from the standpoint of the child, that your child has to be a bit vulnerable as well. When you're having those, some of those conversations of hey, I'm going to pull the curtain back on some of their struggles and hope that we're going to be able to work together to make this the best year they've ever had.

Ashley: 28:21

Yes, so that is, and I would recommend not doing those things in front of your student, and I don't mean that like no, for sure, but that does happen, and then that kind of it doesn't really build our relationship. And now I don't really know how to approach if the kid's sitting there hearing all but yes, to say this is the past of my child, this is the past of my family, even just a note or an email, just casual, and that I think as a teacher, it also allows me the opportunity to be human with you.

Ashley: 28:51

You know so when you have shown that maybe everything's not perfect or you're a little nervous, or these are some things you need from me, it lets me know you're not judging me and that we can be open and connected together. So it is powerful.

Brooke: 29:03

Yeah.

Ashley: 29:04

And we know we don't have it together either. So, don't feel like you have to be perfect for the teacher.

Becca: 29:09

I'm already like I'm sorry we're on the struggle bus this morning, whatever, and they're like girl, it's okay.

Ashley: 29:14

We're all in this together. Yes, we are.

Becca: 29:16

And I'm just like oh, thank you, Because that just takes an automatic weight off.

Brooke: 29:21

Yeah.

Becca: 29:23

When you feel like they've got your back. We're on the same team feel like they've got your back, we're on the same team. They've got extra pencils. It's okay, because I'm like oh gosh, I forgot. That's the one thing I forgot on their school list this year. I'm like pencils Break your finger, use your foot. No, I'm kidding, I know.

Clint: 29:38

My son was like they might not use pencils, though I don't know the Chromebook, they're like two packs of these pencils, and I did.

Becca: 29:50

We've already lost them, it's fine, Right? And Logan told me yesterday he's like oh, yeah, I've gone this whole time without pencils. He's like, yeah, the teacher gives me one every day, it's fine. And I'm like oh bless. It's okay, but I did, I respond or you know, emailed her and she's like it's fine, we have not even worried about it, these are no concerns. So teachers like that, I just adore and appreciate.

Clint: 30:14

There's a lot of schools represented. So my kids for the first time were at Majors. They've been at Arnold and White Oak for the last seven years, I guess, and you're at Ruth Hill Elementary School, so yours are at Western.

Malinda: 30:32

Arnold and White Oak and East Coweta.

Clint: 30:35

And East Coweta. Oh, we've got an Indian AC Indian.

Brooke: 30:37

How about that? We've got to get you over here.

Clint: 30:40

And then Brooke Ella's at Atkinson, atkinson and right here in downtown New York, so there's all kinds of schools here in the Coweta county that's represented. I you know my experience so far with coweta county school system. Um, it's rare that I've met someone in the conversations that's working for the school that doesn't want what's best for the kids that are in their classroom, and sometimes, honestly, with having kind of an inside view with my wife working in the Coweta County School System, but then also just my role here in the community and our role with teachers, I found that sometimes teachers' hopes and their dreams and their wishes for their kids are very aligned with parents in terms of safety and learning, and not just physical safety but like just feeling like they have a safe place to learn, like those align. So often the thing that distracts us most is teachers are overwhelmed with a lot of other things to do that have nothing to do with that for the kids and sometimes they're a little unsupported. And I know I've seen that my wife's been teaching for 16, 17 years and so when we planted foundation, one of the things that I knew that I thought, or at least I felt that if we could make a difference if we wanted to change things in our community and when I say change, I don't mean noon, that's broken, but I do mean that any community has a lot of brokenness in it, regardless of where you go, that it would start in the heart of what Noonan is, which is any thriving city is their children.

Clint: 32:29

And when you think through, how do you impact children in a very positive way? The no-brainer thing to me is to support teachers, because teachers spend an exorbitant amount of time with those children that are the heart of any thriving community. And so when we think through, hey, how do we take care of teachers? Obviously I think there's 32 public schools, maybe in Coweta County, and so you know you can go a mile wide and then only be an inch deep, and so we haven't been able to figure out how do we do this for 32 schools. So we just picked one or two and now it's grown to three or four where we just want to invest heavily and do our very best to make the teachers there and the administration there the lunchroom ladies, janitorial staff, parapros, like the whole thing just make them feel like, hey, someone else has got my back and maybe let them know that people are seeing all the hard things and that it's worth pushing through the hard things to get back to the main thing, which is educating kids not just with standards, but eventually you're going to grow up and be a really great human being. That's then our community is going to benefit from who God's made you to be, and so I think one of the things that everyone needs to hear is we need to find a way to bring more encouragement to the educators in our life, whether that's people that are doing it homeschool and leading those cohorts and creating opportunities for all these homeschool crew to get together, public school teachers the whole thing. We need to be thinking more in that vein of. If we honestly want to do the very best job at setting our kids up for the greatest success, then we need to make sure we're enormous encouragers of those who are driving the majority of that time, which are those people at the schools.

Clint: 34:32

And so I know sometimes, when we're anxious about things, a lot of times the negative overshadows anything. Something bad happens and suddenly we're on a rampage because not my kid and we sometimes have the ability to ignore all of the other really great things that have gone right in the school system for our kids, because this is a glaring thing and I think we've got to be careful as just human beings and community members, to make sure that we're doing our part. On the encouragement side, I think no one's going to fight for your kid more than you should and you shouldn't expect anyone else to. They're not. You know that kid's not anyone else's kids. No one's going to fight harder for you, so you should fight extremely hard mama bear, papa bear, whatever analogy you want to use but I think we need to make sure that same intensity is put into the encouragement of teachers as it is into the hey, you know not with my kid kind of thing.

Clint: 35:38

Have you experienced like positive, negative things from parents? Is that one of the things you stress about when you're thinking about the school year? I know you mentioned that sometimes there's a little bit of a at your school in particular, there's a little bit of lack of parent engagement or parent involvement. But how do you handle that when you're thinking like I mean, obviously your heart's on display. You shared kind of your heart with us, but still, like you're a teacher of the year and then teacher of the year for the county and like almost like for the whole freaking country.

Brooke: 36:12

Yes.

Clint: 36:13

But that doesn't mean that you're perfect, right. So I'm sure at some point I mean maybe I mean pretty awesome things nonstop about you, but let's just pretend for a second that one person was angry at some point.

Ashley: 36:25

My husband could give you examples. He's not here, so we have none, that's right.

Clint: 36:31

How do you deal with that from a teacher standpoint? And the heart for kids, but also the reality that it is. I mean, how many kids do you have right now?

Ashley: 36:40

I'm fortunate this year I'm starting off with only 16.

Clint: 36:43

Oh, let's go. So I have a small beautiful number that's a great

Becca: 36:47

ratio Today, today, yes, today, it could be today. Next week, my stepdad would knock on.

Ashley: 36:52

So we are blessed we have really small class sizes but yes, I think my very big. I love teaching. I feel like I was. You know you spoke to when you found your purpose, like teachers who know that this is what they're meant to do. I know the exact instant I decided I grew up thinking I wanted to. I always knew I wanted to work with children and make children's lives better. I thought I wanted to be in child advocacy. I went to college to go. I was getting a degree in child psychology. I wanted to apply to law school and I sat in one teacher's classroom kindergarten teacher, ms Olson and she taught in Bibb County schools, near Macon public schools, and she was very different than the dynamic of the families that she interacted with and taught. She was very quiet. She was so powerful and the connection, how you saw the joy that students show Brooke when they see her. The kids would walk into her classroom and there would just be this joy and my hours I had to put in her room changed my career path. Like that's what I want, like that's the front line. You know if I'm a lawyer I'm going to be so. I love coming to work. I really do love.

Ashley: 37:57

When summer break ends, I used to cry over school breaks.

Ashley: 38:01

I don't do that anymore Now I'm thankful for them. But it is very intimidating and overwhelming when you really feel like you are doing the very best you know to do and you are hit with what feels to be criticism or just an unsupportive, almost aggression from a parent that you would literally and have to train for and not like step in front of a bullet for I would not go home to make sure your kid goes home and I feel like I'm being attacked and I think that's why it feels so personal to me when a parent is unpleased. Because my job is so personal to me, I put so much of my heart in it. But yes, I recently it wasn't to me directly, it was just to my school but recently had parent displeasure with an event we were trying to host at school and really trying to make it different and more approachable for our families, because the classroom can be pretty intimidating for parents too, especially if parents weren't successful as students. So, instead of the first time, you meeting me coming into my classroom where I look like the expert and you're coming into my territory and you feel maybe judged or want to be the perfect parent.

Ashley: 39:16

I was part of a team that we planned. We called it a block party. Outside it did end up being rather warm.

Ashley: 39:24

So the weather was not in our favor August in Georgia. But instead of like a constructive criticism, of thank you for the effort, but next time can we reconsider. Maybe the time of day it was met with some pretty non-supportive almost like it was like thoughtless that the school would do this one. Really it was like thoughtless that the school would do this one. Really it was very thoughtful.

Ashley: 39:49

So I think that's the hardest part is, no matter how passionate or purposeful or well-intended you are, to understand that there is, there are people out there who are going to let their, their frustrations, their anxieties speak for them more than they're going their gratitudes, and I think in public school that's a big thing. And the way society is now and what the news shows and the things you see, I think parents are afraid of, like how do I? There's no cameras in the classroom. How do I even know that my child is being well spoken to, respected, loved? Maybe they've had bad experiences themselves and so, as a teacher who would never like I, I do make mistakes, but I would never disrespect a student.

Ashley: 40:32

When I met with a parent who just seems extremely frustrated or upset with me, it stops me in my tracks, it breaks my heart. To be honest, I carry it home. I can't sleep. So I think, yeah, that is a big anxiety of the start of a school year, especially because you don't know the parents yet and they don't know you yet. So if I mess up in these first couple of weeks it might damage the whole year of relationship. So when a parent reaches out to me and says this is where we're coming from, this is what I need from you. That allows me the opportunity to build that connection also. But I think I'm rambling, but I do.

Clint: 41:11

That makes sense?

Brooke: 41:12

No, it does for sure.

Ashley: 41:13

It's very nerve wracking it's overwhelming.

Clint: 41:16

How is your faith playing a role in that conflict when, obviously, you feel like, hey, I was a part of a team that made a really great decision that we were thinking about I mean, honestly, it sounds like you were thinking about people who would typically be disconnected from the educational system as a whole and trying to prioritize them over anything else. Yes, and you feel like I've got a really good case, and then, obviously, whoever has the complaints also feels like they've got a really good case, and then, obviously, whoever has the complaints also feels like they've got a really good case. So how does faith play a role in how you handle conflict, even when you think this is still the right thing to do?

Ashley: 42:00

I have learned, as my faith has and I'm new to faith a redeveloping, regrowing my relationship with God. It abruptly stopped about six years ago, so I've kind of over the last year, started rebuilding. But through that, through the community of faith-goers that are around me and the support that a church-like foundation and being part of that, and how y'all pour into teachers to know that I'm not alone, I don't have to be so protective and feisty the word that you used I can take a breath and I've learned how to just try to see it from their eyes. So before I respond, I feel all the things, but just breathing and really thinking through their perspective and is there legitimacy to it? Because there's going to be, there's going to be something that they're right about and they have a good case. So trying to see that validate that you're right, it was hot or you're. You know you are correct, this could have been better, it wasn't a perfectly ran event and then just trying to stay encouraging and moving forward because I don't want to break that relationship. So I don't want. I want it to get closer to them and very similar to what you speak to of.

Ashley: 43:13

You know, we don't want to be around people who just are just like us or believe like that, or who just want to cheerlead for us. We need to bring in the people who you know this could be an opponent, and so, let's, we want to get on the same team. So I think it just, especially if it's a parent. That's our community, that's who I'm here for, for their kids. So I need, I need to heal that relationship. So I think faith gives me that the ability to step outside myself and think about the bigger picture and really what's my purpose in this role, and so I can tell them all my personal concerns with what they said. But that relationship will be completely broken. Or I can try to take a breath, see it from their side, and how do we move forward? I can't, I'm not going to fix what they're upset about, but what?

Brooke: 44:00

can I do moving forward to bring them in and to comfort?

Brooke: 44:01

I love that you brought up the moving forward part, because immediately hearing the story of this is what happened.

Brooke: 44:07

It had the very best intention and a parent came in hot and I immediately thought there have been times that, as a parent, I have come in hot and then going back and I hope, I would hope that once the parent heard the story of, hey, this is why, this is why we did it, Like we were trying to be more engaging, more just, inclusive, like all these things that they were like oh, let me take my little chill pill for a minute, you know, but then thinking through as well, coming back after that.

Brooke: 44:39

That's a bit embarrassing because I don't know how they acted, but there for sure have been times where I have showed my tail and having to come back after that and rebuild that relationship from my standpoint and not think I'm going to come in here and I'm either going to continue the way I'm acting or I'm going to have to eat crow. But like, how is the best case scenario of a parent flipping the switch on that, Of it not being oh, that's that mom that lost her poo about the cookout you know like how do you rebuild that to?

Brooke: 45:14

get in that healthy place of hey, we're a community here, we're here for each other, we want to trust each other. I want to bring to you my concerns and I want to be in a place where I'll receive your concerns. Like, how, how do we come back from that, that hot moment, literally, and you know, metaphorically, like, how do we come back from that, that hot moment, literally? And you know, metaphorically, like, how do we come back from that as a parent? How do people come back from that as a teacher standpoint? Like, what does that look like?

Ashley: 45:38

I think that is the team mentality and I think we've lost that and that's where we really need to rebuild is that we are all on the same team and we are all working. Like you said, teachers are trying to keep safe and protect and build character and all those things, and that's what parents want for their kid. And so, just like if you dropped a pass in the big game and the quarterback threw that perfect spiral and you're in the end zone and then you're the one with the you know the butterfingers and you drop it, there might be some discomfort and some animosities and some, but at some point we've, we've got to just hey, my bad. I mean, to me it's that easy. Like my bad, I was out of line, or I do feel like I was right, but maybe I could have communicated, because I do respect you and I do know that you're important for my child, um, and so what can we do?

Ashley: 46:26

I think just those words. We don't even have to talk about that. But what can we do? I think just those words, we don't even have to talk about that. But what can we do, moving forward to get to a good place where we are both on the same page. You do. You do have my respect, hopefully, and I do think there's teachers who lose parents' respect and lose parents' trust. So I think teachers being able to say that same thing hey, you caught me on an off day and there's no excuse for the way I spoke to you, my tone, my dismissiveness I think that's probably more of a one that parents want to be validated and seen. Teachers do as well, I'm sure, and teachers yes yes, you're human.

Ashley: 47:02

That moment wasn't our brightest. I know it was uncomfortable for all of us. But what can we now do? You know, moving forward. I was, you know, you and I have shared a conversation where I was like Brooke, I think I was a little childish and I was, you know, I was a little judgmental and I am sorry, and let's move forward and build a relationship. So I think when you make relationships the center, especially when it comes to parent and teacher, your ego has to step aside. What you want is the best for your kid. As a parent, you have to be connected to that teacher and as a teacher, what I want is the most growth, success, learning, outcome. I need to be as connected as I can be to the parent.

Clint: 47:42

Yeah, I agree, I think you can do it that way, or a year and a half from now. You can also just say next time you address me, call me Dr Castle.

Brooke: 47:54

So you can write that down as well for your next response.

Clint: 47:57

I hear you, but I actually didn't hear you because don't call me Ashley, don't call me Ms Castles, it's Dr to you there you go Doctor. You write that in cursive for you.

Ashley: 48:08

I got pretty handwriting. I didn't practice cursive in school.

Clint: 48:11

We don't teach that anymore.

Brooke: 48:12

That's right, it's out of here, If you want to send me an email on your Chromebook, though we would know.

Clint: 48:18

That's right, that's a whole other conversation. I'm 100% against Chromebooks. I them same. I. I wish join the club like if it wasn't for my wife, who is an advocate for teachers.

Brooke: 48:32

Go figure, as a teacher we'd set them on fire?

Clint: 48:33

I would, I would, I would tell, I would tell the whole public school system. My kids are not using them. Yep, zero chances. Uh, they're not coming, they're not allowed in my house. Don't, don't do it, I don't want them. Yeah, we're not going to do it, I don't. I'm not signing a piece of paper saying I'm responsible for them. It breaks it. It's your problem if you give it to them Zero. I wish I could say that.

Brooke: 48:53

But we just signed the paper and then we let our kid run away from home.

Clint: 48:56

That's right. Get on it. It's fine. We're fine, it's fine. How do you feel as a teacher? How do you feel about Chrome?

Ashley: 49:12

I think also elementary school is different. I just think there's something very authentic about paper-pencil, about hands-on, about manipulatives, about conversation. So my classroom is a lot more discussion-based, it's a lot more doing projects. We don't use the Chromebooks, dr.

Clint: 49:33

Horton, I'm going to ask that you would step down, and Ashley is going to take your. I'm just kidding.

Brooke: 49:39

Yes, where do we sign?

Ashley: 49:40

And there's some things that we have to with the decisions being made and I think, cost-effectiveness being one of them, not having textbooks, not having Sure, which I think have made a way to, they're starting to come back. Yay, I'm sorry. Reading curriculum and stuff is more in your hands, but a lot of the programs and that kind of thing. So it's easier to have kids log on and no matter where your kids are or what they have.

Ashley: 50:06

They can have access and those kind of things. But as far as instruction in your classroom, you lose the relationship piece when we're all looking here instead of up here. And one thing one of our specific goals at our school this year is increasing the verbal communication within our students. And I know, I noticed that at home as a mom with Brianna. She'll be in the backseat with her friends and she's raised as an only child. All her siblings are out of that, you know, grown, and so it's just us and we'll. She'll be in the backseat of the friend and they'll just be silent, like she just got in the car, like how?

Becca: 50:40

are you not beaming with things Right, not going?

Ashley: 50:41

crazy but it's, and I noticed that in the class they don't really know how to communicate. They watch other families on their devices and watch what other people do, and they're not really learning how how to do it themselves. So I think in the classroom, especially as much technology as most kids do have at home and the time they spend on at home, I do intentionally try to limit that so we have more of the eye contact, the conversation, and I'm developing as your teacher. I get to know you much better if I'm watching you write, watching you talk, watching you participate, not participate, lead not lead those kind of things that a Chromebook stifles sometimes which grade are you teaching?

Clint: 51:19

this year You're teaching.

Ashley: 51:20

Fifth grade this year. Fifth grade this year.

Clint: 51:21

So I'm taking my kids out of sixth and eighth grade. We're going back to fifth grade In my head.

Brooke: 51:26

I'm like how do we just like duplicate Ashley, that's right.

Ashley: 51:30

How do we just? You mentioned Western. Dana DiGennaro, the assistant principal at Western, is to me like such a mentor. She's a dear friend but a huge mentor. Cheryl McCharge is very smart and gifted in education at Western Elm Street that's right across the corner. I'm just giving shout-outs to very passionate Molly Bryant at Elm Street. Super purposeful, passionate Rebecca Craver, who just became the math specialist for Coweta County, the content specialist, Huge, passionate, purposeful people in education. Austin Martin at Moreland so throughout the county, at least I can speak for elementary school Purposeful.

Clint: 52:12

Paula.

Ashley: 52:12

Corley, who I believe is at White Oak, just implanted throughout, and some of them huge advocates of technology. Chromebooks, sure, but I think it's also the way in which it's implemented. Yes, and how it's being used.

Ashley: 52:24

If you are working with a partner and y'all are developing a project through your technology a Google Slides, a Canva that's very different than log on and do these problems. So I think the intention and the use of the technology in the classroom because a lot of those people are techie and they love it, but it's not a sit and do, it's a collaborate.

Brooke: 52:45

Well, and the reality is, we are in a world where things are becoming more technologically advanced, and so those skill sets are important.

Clint: 52:54

However, yeah, my son loves them just to play games, yes, and so those skill sets are important. However, yeah, my son loves them just to play games?

Clint: 52:58

Yes, and so he sits in the penalty box, that's whatever I don't know, that's what they call it when he's they like lock his Chromebook down. Sorry, I'm just throwing you all over the internet, but he just loves like he does his work, he gets done and then he just plays games. And then he is, he's locked into whatever game, which at first it was like these are educational games. I can't remember what were they called Gallopade or something? No, like they're games that you can earn things. He's like I'm earning stuff and I'm doing math problems, and it's like that's 4% learning, like 96%, you're just playing some kind of whatever.

Clint: 53:29

And so he kind of stays locked down on that Chromebook every once in a while, which makes it more difficult for teachers because they tell him to do something he doesn't have access to it. It's so. So it's a little frustrating, but I would for sure be a huge advocate of of Chromebooks that had to stay at school and only were used minimally. I also fan of banning smartphones at school. I'm a huge fan. I don't know if, uh, if, we're y' sit on it, but I just I like, hey, look, I get it. Kids need to be able to call their parents if there's an emergency, which a normal dumb phone can do, but the smartphone is unrestricted access to the internet for kids.

Clint: 54:09

As a pastor who sits with a lot of families, it's pretty rare that I'm sitting with a family that says this smartphone has changed my kid's life for the better. When I say rare, I actually don't have one single conversation I can think of. It is always the Internet or someone on the Internet or something on the Internet has caused a lot of heartbreak or dysfunction, dysfunctional thoughts or just no good. So I there's a site called wait until eighth that I'm a huge advocate for. I tell as many people as possible and their whole thing is they're trying to gather people that will in community say hey, we want to support educators that want phones, smartphones, not to be a part of the classroom setting. And I wish Coweta County would get behind it. Which parents would be livid right, I get it.

Brooke: 55:07

I already know like my kid.

Clint: 55:09

It's like all right, cool, your kid can still text. You call you. All those things you know, they're just, they're just not going to be able to. You know all those things you know they're just not going to be able to. You know, watch porn on their phone when it's, you know, when the teacher's teaching with a hoodie up and an AirPod in, you know, or any other situation that might come up, which is a completely different thing. So how do you feel about that as a parent? You don't have to agree with me at all. There's no pressure. I'm just curious.

Malinda: 55:39

I think it would be a great idea. All right, there's two of us.

Clint: 55:42

There's two of us, Clint and Melinda. We are leading the charge. That's it. As a teacher, where do you fall? On that Again, you don't have to agree at all.

Ashley: 55:51

Well at allow our students to access their phones during the school day. Okay, so they can stay in their book bags because we understand you might go home and you need to let your parent know you're safe, but they come in there.

Clint: 56:00

Is that just Ruth Hill? Or are all schools typically saying hey, that's my?

Ashley: 56:04

understanding is that's that the County standard is my understanding.

Ashley: 56:11

I know at Evans and Smokey um Smokey road middle school. I think that's been a big push to keep those distractions away. My biggest concern with cell phones as a teacher is last year was my first year in fifth grade since cell phones. I did it many moons ago and it was the sole biggest contributor to bullying fights, unsafety in the classroom. A feeling of insecurity was what was happening at home on the smartphones when the kids are in their rooms or hanging out with friends and it's not being super. You know we have fifth graders with Snapchat and it would. So things would come in the classroom that I have no even awareness of and it would just blow up. And if that cell phone was removed, there is no doubt that those problems wouldn't have even existed.

Brooke: 57:08

You know.

Ashley: 57:08

So just that I have a I like the wait until eighth. First, kids even have smartphones, let alone them be in the classroom.

Brooke: 57:16

Yeah, sure, which it is a, let alone them be in the classroom. Yeah, for sure which.

Clint: 57:18

it is a go ahead. No, you go ahead.

Brooke: 57:19

It is a super hard thing, I know, for us. We have a blended family and so, whereas with Ella, who is in her mom and dad are in the same home, we have a lot more control over. You don't need a cell phone, you can walk, we have a relationship with someone at the school, you can, they can call me, that kind of thing, whereas with our boys and my daughter they would go to their other parents home or like there was and a phone wouldn't always be available for them to call me and like all those things. And so there definitely is that. Sure you hate to say exception to the rule, because there's really a really good exception to the rule, but for sure we should have just gotten, you know, a jitterbug or caroline or a firefly, whatever they're called.

Brooke: 58:05

Like we should have gotten that for them at that age instead of a smartphone. Um, I think the hard thing is and car Caroline is a sweet Caroline. She's a tender heart and for sure she would have gotten bullied horribly if I had sent her to school with that. You know, you can call these four people. One of them is 9-1-1. Like she would have been so bullied, or one of those little Nokia's Right, like it would have been so bad and she wouldn't have said a word. She just would have gotten bullied and not said anything. And then I would have found out and I would have been livid and shown my parent tail. But you know, that is such the hard thing that when you have kiddos that aren't going to be the spicy kids that speak up and say you're not going to believe what someone said to me today, they're going to be the ones that you're like baby, why are you crying? Nothing, I just had a bad day. And they keep it to themselves when really you know she had that four person phone call.

Ashley: 59:02

That, which is also another uh, like to keep the phones away? Yep, like. So there's not comparing of what apps I have and what you're not overly exposing. I got iPhone 15, 15, what you got, yes, no, and they do know they do If I get a new phone, miss Castles, is that and I don't have a new phone now, but is that a da-da-da Like?

Brooke: 59:20

you are seven Like they'll come in off the bus.

Ashley: 59:23

knowing the name, the type, yes.

Becca: 59:25

How do you use it?

Brooke: 59:27

Yeah, yeah, they'll show you things. Yeah, and you're like, how'd you call from?

Ashley: 59:32

there, brianna has, like the Inspector, gadget watch, the Gizmo watch from Verizon and so that way when she goes to friends and stuff she can, but it is, I mean, and it's all out loud, so there's no privacy. So yeah, when she's 13, that would be a little different, it would be hard.

Brooke: 59:47

Yeah, how is it, from your perspective, thinking through the lens of having kiddos, that do your kiddos have phones and all that?

Malinda: 59:59

kind of stuff, not now. They did. Well, my older son did. I wish there was an option for him, because I'm divorced and so it would be nice to have it's kind of like. It's difficult for me, you know, I can call his dad to talk to him, but sometimes his dad's not at home and he doesn't have a home phone, and so something I'm just trying to look into is something I can have at home. But, yeah, going into that's the one thing for my older son, like he's brought it up again because he's like probably the only kid now that your son's not at school that doesn't have a phone. But right now we're just, you know, we're just going with it, and he's in seventh grade and I'm trying to hold out as long as I can, but I think that it's.

Malinda: 1:00:41

It is difficult to make that decision, but I do think, like internet, social media, there's no reason. No, my daughters had um, social media, not all of them, but like, like instagram, and still I feel like that just sucked them in. I I think for boys and girls it's different, like I noticed different things, like my daughter's, just like you know the comparing and all that stuff, and I feel like I wish I would not have let her have that. So young, my oldest and yeah, but I feel like now I feel like our generation, with the kids you know, my older, that's when it was first coming out and nobody really knew.

Brooke: 1:01:17

And then now like yeah, my nine-year-old said I'm about to be the only kid without a phone and I'm like what it's crazy, but I will say as an encouragement to you you said your son doesn't have his phone right now. Our 23-year-old lost his phone for an entire school year and anytime anything has ever been brought up with a discipline issue, like a school issue, anything he's like, take the phone away, take the phone away. That's the best decision you're ever going to make, brooke. Just take the phone away. And he still says it was one of the best things we ever did for him to take his phone away.

Brooke: 1:01:51

And he just didn't have access to it for a year, so encouragement for you that they're not going to say it right now, but when they're in their twenties they will be so thankful.

Clint: 1:02:00

On the wait till eighthorg website. It's got a list of phones that are not internet capable. They're not smartphones at all. They function like like. I guess phones used to be like the next tail. I don't know if y'all had a next tail. They don't have the DD, but they have. You know, they function like a dumb phone, and so they've got a list of them and they've got a couple of them that are legit. The problem is they're not going to be blue bubbles if they're friends or iPhone users, just the worst, they're going to be green bubble people, which I make fun of in my friend circle.

Brooke: 1:02:33

It's like dude you are ruining my group message.

Clint: 1:02:38

So get with the iPhone and figure it out quick. You know what I'm saying. I mean I'm not saying we can't be friends because I'm a pastor and I'm biblical, but in my heart that's what I feel. So for sure. I mean I'm putting them on that, but when I think about it, when I think about it, when I think about the lack of phone smartness, smartphones or whatever, whenever we make that step with E because he's our oldest, he's 13, I know, like you said, that there are going to be people that are like that's the dumbest thing I've ever seen. Your phone doesn't X, y, z, whatever. You're not on this, that and the other. I know that's going to happen.

Clint: 1:03:19

E is not as outspoken as I am. He internalized a lot of things. Hadley is completely different. She will say anything to anyone at any time, but E won't. However, as I've processed it, the conclusion I've come to as a dad is I know that very well about E and I also know that will be a problem he will face. But those two things I feel like I have a much better opportunity at leading him through than the unknown of unrestricted internet access, which also guarantees that anyone else in the entire world could have unrestricted access to him. That's a battle I don't know how to fight, because it's a battle. I don't know when it starts or if he even realizes it started.

Clint: 1:04:13

But the other two, I can prepare him for the other two. I can remind him hey, dude, you've got goals about being a Division I athlete, and so when people say, hey, why don't you have social media, this and other, you just simply tell them I don't have time because my goals are too big to allow me to have time to do those things. I can prepare him with answers. I can prepare him to say hey, you've got to be comfortable in your own skin, even when you're not comfortable in your own skin, and you've got to show some confidence, even sometimes when you're not confident, just because God's never going to leave you and walk by yourself all alone through anything. And even if it doesn't feel like it, he still made a promise he's with you through anything. And even if it doesn't feel like it, he still made a promise he's with you.

Clint: 1:05:03

And then I also want that my kids to know that there's not a single school policy on the planet that would keep me from protecting my children. It doesn't exist and I know, as embarrassing as that would be for me to show up on campus and probably breaking a law at some point for me to show up on campus and probably breaking a law at some point they're going to be okay, they're going to be all right and I'm going to fight for them and I want them to know that I'll fight for them and I also want them to know that they've got incredible teachers that also will fight for them, that when they show up, their thought is I want every one of my kids, which includes Emerson and Hadley, to have a really great day at school today and that when the school year begins to come to a close, that their hope is. I hope this school year is one they'll never forget and was impactful, and I hope that the work I did as a teacher has set them up for the grade to come, because every year builds on one another and slowly but surely, each teacher gets to have a small say in the building blocks that create the human being that they're going to become, and sometimes those building blocks are a little shaky. Not every teacher again wakes up in the morning and eats and sleeps and breathes the idea of student success and passion for it.

Clint: 1:06:27

But most of the teachers I've met that's their hope and if we can keep encouraging and equipping them, caring for them puts them in the very best place to do that for the kids that honestly we would do anything for. And then, as parents, if we can limit their obstacles and not add to it as best we can, to know the battles they're going to fight, before they have to fight them as best we can, so that we can prepare them as best we can, as best we can, so that we can prepare them as best we can. And then at the end of the day Melinda, I think honestly you said it at the beginning like they're my kids, but even before they were my kids they were God's kids. And long after I'm gone I will have no ability to protect them when I breathe my last breath, but he still will, and so I think my faith's just got to grow.

Clint: 1:07:20

I've got to prepare like God will never intervene, but then have faith like he could do anything without me, without me ever have done any preparation at all, and that's kind of the approach we've got to take. I'm super pumped that the two of you came and joined us today.

Ashley: 1:07:38

Yeah thanks.

Clint: 1:07:39

Thanks for hanging out and having a school discussion. For those of you who are listening or watching, we're going to be having some conversations this fall as we move forward with, I think, some pretty interesting guests. This was just kind of the kickoff of our fall podcast season with the Flatbill Pastor podcast, and I enjoyed our conversation. This is good. I did too, Becca Brooke, any closing thoughts?

Brooke: 1:08:08

Yeah, I'm again just to kind of reiterate what he said. I'm super thankful for just the willingness to be transparent about some parent concerns that are some of my parent concerns as well, that we are in this together and it's not just me being crazy, that these are legitimate. And two again, you hit the nail on the head. One of the biggest things is saying, hey, these are God's kids. One of the hardest things is living that out, but again, with community and reminding myself and others of that, it'll just be a habit you have to create. I'm also super pumped and excited and ready to have conversations that scared the bejesus out of me with Ella's teachers, but I know, if I want to set her up for success, it's one of the most important things and to look at it as a glass half full thing instead of a glass half empty because, my kiddos' teachers are probably hoping the exact same thing.

Becca: 1:09:06

Absolutely yes, they are that relationship yes. Yes, I definitely feel encouraged after this conversation, as a parent too, and know that I'm not alone. So I thank y'all for coming and having this talk. Yep, thank y'all, thank you.

Brooke: 1:09:25

Cool Until next time.

Clint: 1:09:27

Episode Lucky 13. Lucky 13. Comes to a close.